I always wanted to have a poor memory. Not because I don't want to remember things.. But, I hate remembering everything which often leads to over thinking. And that Over thinking causes nothing but brings out the worst in you.
Lately, I have realized or rather observed I am losing my past from my brain... Or experiencing a different phase may be... I can't recall things easily from my memory and its not just memory, I find it almost impossible to recollect what I did last week, month, yesterday or even in the morning... I forget about movies watched, places visited and people met... Forgetting faces and names is just very normal for me... May be this has helped me in maintaining a diary at workplace...
Its something like an initial stage of amnesia of 'Drew Barrymore' as shown in '50 first dates..
And that's not all... I even face attacks from my memories... Like all of sudden I feel about certain people or moments very strongly and emotionally and all of sudden in fraction of second I go blank... I am not sure whether its serious or not but I wanted to jot it down before I again forget what is happening....
I really can't recall or feel the time when I started this piece and the feel is washed off... I can't feel many things but at the same time I feel certain things so bad that they hurt... And, I am not on any medication... Yes, I take my caffeine dose but that's under check...
At times, I go thinking about one thing for hours and in a second I forget it completely as if it never happened...
When I read my old posts.. I wonder... it's written by me... How's it possible... I mean I really thought all that.... That's really great work...but really... I mean its hard to believe...
I have changed mentally and emotionally although I am still weird emotionally but mentally I am total different human... I feel I dunno who I am... I keep searching myself.... And I dunno what all I jotted down...
God, as usual I'll ask for the same thing which no amnesia can erase.. take care of my people and bless me with a poor memory...
Lately, I have realized or rather observed I am losing my past from my brain... Or experiencing a different phase may be... I can't recall things easily from my memory and its not just memory, I find it almost impossible to recollect what I did last week, month, yesterday or even in the morning... I forget about movies watched, places visited and people met... Forgetting faces and names is just very normal for me... May be this has helped me in maintaining a diary at workplace...
Its something like an initial stage of amnesia of 'Drew Barrymore' as shown in '50 first dates..
And that's not all... I even face attacks from my memories... Like all of sudden I feel about certain people or moments very strongly and emotionally and all of sudden in fraction of second I go blank... I am not sure whether its serious or not but I wanted to jot it down before I again forget what is happening....
I really can't recall or feel the time when I started this piece and the feel is washed off... I can't feel many things but at the same time I feel certain things so bad that they hurt... And, I am not on any medication... Yes, I take my caffeine dose but that's under check...
At times, I go thinking about one thing for hours and in a second I forget it completely as if it never happened...
When I read my old posts.. I wonder... it's written by me... How's it possible... I mean I really thought all that.... That's really great work...but really... I mean its hard to believe...
I have changed mentally and emotionally although I am still weird emotionally but mentally I am total different human... I feel I dunno who I am... I keep searching myself.... And I dunno what all I jotted down...
God, as usual I'll ask for the same thing which no amnesia can erase.. take care of my people and bless me with a poor memory...
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